Welcome to the Speed Force
Are you tired of sleeping? Do you find that 24 hours just isn't enough time to disassemble and reassemble your toaster oven three times? Welcome to MethSpace, your retro-modern guide to the highs, lows, and missing molars of the fast lane.
Did You Know?
Cleaning your entire house with a toothbrush is not only efficient, it's a great cardio workout!
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Tales from the Shadow Realm
Let me tell you about Gary. Gary once decided that the government was listening to him through his drywall. He spent three days carefully removing every sheet of drywall in his apartment. Did he find the bugs? No. But he did find a very confused raccoon living in the insulation. Gary and the raccoon are now roommates. They're starting a podcast about structural integrity.
Then there's Sheila. Sheila was convinced she could communicate with electricity. She spent a week staring at a lamp, waiting for it to blink "hello" in Morse code. It turned out the bulb was just loose. But for that week, Sheila felt a connection deeper than any Wi-Fi signal. She now works as a very enthusiastic electrician.
Getting Better (Seriously)
Look, we joke because if we didn't, we'd cry. But getting healthy is the ultimate high. Amphetamines might make you feel like a god for six hours, but sleep, nutrition, and hydration make you feel like a functioning human being for decades.
Hydrate or Diedrate
Drink water. No, Mountain Dew Code Red doesn't count. Your kidneys are screaming. Listen to them.
Sleep: The Original Trip
Remember dreams? Those weird movies your brain plays when you're unconscious? You can have those again! All it takes is closing your eyes for more than 15 minutes without checking the window blinds for unmarked vans.
Save Your Smile
Worried about your teeth? You should be. Check out our comprehensive Dental Care Guide for tips on keeping your pearly whites from becoming pearly nothings.